It wasn't until a few weeks ago I heard of this unsolved mystery, and on July 8, 2020 the Saratoga County Sheriff's Office marked the 27th anniversary of the murder of Betty Conley. A few days ago a friend reached out to me with a request to write about this story. It wasn't until 6am this morning I sat down to go through everything - videos, newspaper articles, and the Justice for Betty Conley Facebook group which I encourage you to join. About an hour ago, I had the opportu

Yesterday was an odd day because it was the two year anniversary of my Mom's passing. I was reflective, grieving, processing, and felt very loved by my friend who texted me in the morning saying she was thinking of me. She lost her Mom a few years ago too, but even so, it's rare someone besides yourself and family remember the date. I told her I wasn't sure how I wanted to spend the day and up to that point, I didn't really want to think about it at all. She reminded me there

I won’t lie and tell you the cover and title of this book had absolutely nothing to do with my selection of this book. I just won’t – because it did. There's no question I'm a cat fanatic but black cats? Forget it - my personal goal is to save each and every one. That said, this isn't a book about cats or black cats - although we do meet a cat named Beelzebub. This collection is a group of short stories by author Michael Swanwick and I have to admit I was very surprised and h

Guest post by Abbe Hanley, Language warning My earliest memory of racism is from elementary school. A boy told me my skin was “dirty like poop” and I believed him. I was maybe five years old and the only black kid in my school. This boy told me my beautiful brown skin was “dirty like poop,” and I believed him. I cannot imagine my mom’s heartbreak when I came home and asked her about it. I am a Black Woman and I am also Jewish. I have been the butt of jokes for longer than I c

It feels like a luxury being able to step away from all that's going not just in our country, but around the world. I recognize that some need a break, because they're able to take one. If that's you, I've got a book series you're going to love. This is the first series I've read by author Leigh Bardugo and I was really impressed. I hadn't heard of her and I tend to read quite a bit of fantasy. Ms. Bardugo is a #1 New York Times bestselling author of fantasy and the creator o

"No matter how open-minded, socially conscious, anti-racist I think I am, I still have old, learned, hidden biases I need to examine. It is my responsibility to check myself daily for my stereotypes, prejudice and ultimately discrimination." I don't know who originally authored this, but I read this on social media this morning and nothing has felt more accurate. It felt like a gut-punch - and it should. It made me uncomfortable but it reinforced what I've always believed and

My friend and brother, Percy Thomas, is tired of just posting on social media We're all angry, frustrated, and want to do more than vent and share on Facebook and Twitter. He has come up with an idea I feel is pretty powerful. When I read his suggestion, I became emotional immediately and unless you don't have a heart, you will too. "We can say it's time to end this violence against unarmed black men. A way for others to get a slim idea what it was like for George Floyd. An o

Self-awareness is a son-of-a-bitch but a necessary one. I finished the book White Fragility by Robin DiAngelo about a week ago and it makes me want to revise my post titled White People - please stop it. But I'm not going to because it's a reminder that every single day I need to learn, to grow, and to do/be better than the day before. “A vital, necessary, and beautiful book, a bracing call to white folk everywhere to see their whiteness for what it is and to seize the opport

I live in California, which was the first state to require all residents to shelter-in-place. We’ve been under this condition since March 19, 2020. I’ve heard and read about the negative aspects of shelter-in-place. While my family and I are experiencing some less-than-awesome parts of this situation, I can’t say it’s been completely awful. Overall, our family has really pulled together. We are more kind to each other than in times past, we have family dinners together e

Tomorrow, May 20, Troy City School Superintendent John Carmello is proposing the removal of the entire Reading Department in the Troy city school district even though only 29% of the student population reads at their grade level. Research shows: Literacy is an essential skill for functioning in society. Dyslexia occurs in 1 out of 5 children in the United States and is the leading cause of reading failure and school dropouts in the country. Literacy professionals play crucial

It started with one tweet from 17 year old Lincoln Debenham on Tuesday, April 14. "Hi @BarackObama! Like most high school/college seniors, I’m saddened by the loss of milestone events, prom & graduation. In an unprecedented time, it would give us great comfort to hear your voice. We ask you to consider giving a national commencement speech to the class of 2020." It turns out Mr. Debenham spoke for a nation. The tweet quickly went viral, and last night on May 16, 2020, Presid

Look, I get that writing this may be doing exactly what I'm suggesting you stop doing, but it needs to be said. I don't care how "woke" you are or how woke you think you are, but your commentary on Ahmaud Arbery isn't helping. Your voice does not have a place unless it's to AMPLIFY black voices. Unless you are sharing and supporting what those voices are saying and have been saying for years, just stop. Five years ago I would have written a piece expressing my horror and cond

So very often I see adults complaining about the "liberal" education their children are getting in the New York State public school system and more often, in colleges around the country. Conservative parents: Now that most (all?) schools in NYS have announced closure until the fall, you can educate them how you wish! Skip all those fancy liberal science classes. You don't need your kids to understand biology or chemistry. Why? Because these classes entail experimentation wher

I wasn't going to write about this because it feels too personal, but a friend reached out after I had checked in to St. Peter's Hospital in Albany a couple weeks ago. I regret that now because a lot of folks messaged and it wasn't really anything I wanted to talk about after. I think I was just sharing an anxiety moment at the time. I was more afraid of being at the hospital during the time of Covid-19 than the reason I had to go. But her own message of fear and asking me to

I've watched my friend Amy go though an amazing physical and emotional transformation in the last few years. I've always loved and adored her, but lately, she has become an inspiration and possibly my (and your) savior. During this quarantine I haven't been able to go to the gym, the weather has my inflammation way up, and I'm simply not moving as much as I used to. On Sunday I put on a bathing suit for the first time since November and I'm starting to expand in all sorts of

I’ve written about many of the relationships in my life. I’ve written about my husband, my ex-husband, my husband’s ex-wife, my teenage daughter, etc. One relationship that I haven’t written about is what may be the most complicated that I’m in – the relationship between me and my mother. I’m the oldest of four children. My parents got married at the age of 19, when they found out they were expecting me. I figured this out when I was approximately 10 years old (when I no

Good morning everyone. In the last few days, several people have reached out asking how they can be included in the Massena Virtual Tipping database for bartenders. The "issue" is they are in a different profession, but still rely on tips to supplement their income. One exception though, and some may argue with this, but I really don't care. If you are a nurse, add yourself. You deserve more than what you are currently receiving, and it's possible people may want to do more t

Friends, I have no idea how I’m doing this. And by this, I mean sitting upright on a couch writing to you all. How the hell am I not lying on my bed, staring at the ceiling? Maybe crying, maybe not. Definitely not feeling at all creative or determined. A miserable, understandably paralyzed lump. As I’ve mentioned in my previous posts, I have a long history of anxiety and catastrophic thinking. Though I couldn’t always control it, it has cost me time, money, friends (perhaps f

I asked the Girl Gone Smart bloggers to recommend their favorite shows for binging. It's quite the mix! Let us know what you're binging! Chrys - Firefly (Hulu) - Deadwood (HBO) - Stumptown (ABC All Access) - See (Apple TV) - The Good Fight (CBS All Access) - Misfits (Hulu) Danny - Bob's Burgers (Hulu) - The Supersizers Go (YouTube - free) - Schitt's Creek (Amazon Prime & Netflix) - Explained (Netflix) - Downton Abbey (Amazon Prime) Heather - The Outsider (HBO) - Tiger King (N

I miss my hometown a lot, and it's with zero shame that I'm "stealing" something I've seen Albany bartenders do with great success. Many of you depend on tips, and since we are no longer able to go sit with you, enjoy a cocktail or beer, or just spend time together, my guess is several of your loyal customers may want to help. You must have been laid off or let go because of COVID-19. The goal is for your customers to be able to virtually tip you during this time, and here is