Updated: Apr 8, 2019
*language warning in the image.
I've been wanting to write about this for a while now, but it's hard to know where to start. I thought it might be easiest to tell you all about myself so that hopefully you can understand me and where I'm coming from.
From a pretty young age I knew that I wasn't interested in marriage or kids. This isn't to say I don't want to settle down with one person for the happily ever after we all want. I just never had a ticking clock pushing me to find the one. I'm happy with my life and who I am, I don't need another person to complete me. I don't want to let someone into my life unless I feel that they will improve it.
I feel that in our day and age it isn't taboo to have sex or children outside of marriage. It isn't a big deal to live with your significant other like it was for our parents. Marriage is also expensive to get into and out of and I know more people who have been divorced than people who have been married for significant amounts of time. The point is it just doesn't make sense to me. I don't need a piece of paper to prove my feelings for someone.
Kids are cute and I do like my nieces, nephews and other well behaved children. But you know what I like more. Sleep. I really enjoy sleeping in on days off. I like being able to take a random out of the blue roadtrip on the weekend because it sounds fun. I love spoiling myself with new clothes and really whatever I want to buy for myself. I'm so impressed by all the parents out there especially the single ones who do it all on their own, it's just not for me.
These are definitely deal breakers for a lot of guys because they want these things. I've always been pretty up front about it because I don't want to waste anyone's time. Having said that I didn't date much in my twenties. I had one serious relationship with a guy who thought he'd be able to change my mind. Clearly he didn't know me well enough.
Now that I'm in my 40s it seems like everyone has gone through a divorce or 2, has had kids and done all those things they wanted then. This should be my time!
I should also tell you I really don't enjoy dating. I get so stressed about it in the couple hours leading up to it I've even thrown up a few times. I know once I get there and meet them I'll be fine. But that nervousness beforehand makes me want to just stay home. I have friends that love dating and enjoy meeting new people. I wish it was that easy for me. They'll also go on multiple dates a week. How is this so easy? I find that I might talk to two people in a year that I feel I have any sort of connection with.
Having said all of this I hope you'll all take what I say with a grain of salt and not be too harsh. I'm going to talk about all sorts of things including things of a sexual nature and I will warn you at the beginning of the blog. Next blog we're going to talk about crafting your best online profile.